8.30 a.m in the morning, we driving off to school. We live in a city called “Auckland”. It was in the north Island of New Zealand. As we got half way to school I saw some of my friends walking to school and some on the school bus. The Neighborhood we lived in was very quiet and peaceful. People were polite and nice to each other.
“Mum are we there yet?” I ask but my mum doesn’t reply she is too busy looking at her side mirror I ask her again but she she still doesn’t reply. As soon as I turn around I realise what she was looking at, “TSUNAMI!” I scream while holding onto my mums seat. She quickly steps on the peddle and pushes the speed up to, 80 miles per hour. but I have read a book that said tsunami’s can travel up 200 miles per hour so I yell at her to go faster but we can’t so she takes me outside and takes me into the school. The people on the bus are to slow the tsunami carries it and pushes it into a building. Poor kids, they were innocent and did no harm but right now I got to focus on myself Its been 20 minutes and we are still trapped in the school. The kids and the teachers around me have got cuts and blood dripping from them. We all are scared. I have never been in a natural disaster my whole life. I think this could be a dream it feels like I pinch myself “AWW!” I yell I smack myself but nothing happens “I’m just making myself look like a fool.” I tell myself.
10 minutes later and the tsunami is all finnish we wait for a couple more minutes to see if their might be an aftershock but their isn’t, we go outside and the whole street is crushed, our house and the neighborhood my body shakes and my teeth chatter the ground is all wet. This whole thing seems like a nightmare coming to reality. “This isn’t real.” I say. I hope that I will wake up in a couple of seconds but nothing happends. “I ask my mum what do we do now?” No reply and think I know what she means. I go on my knees and pray to god to help and make everything better. My mind is blank I got nothing to think about only the things right in front of my eyes. I have no more words left...
3 comments:
* One thing I love about your narrative story is That you were trying your best to keep the story in place.
* My favourite sentence of your story is "Poor kids, they were innocent and did no harm but right now I got to focus on myself Its been 20 minutes and we are still trapped in the school"
One thing I think you could work on next time is to describe more in the orientation.
* One thing I love about your narrative story is I pinch myself “AWW!” I yell I smack myself but nothing happens “I’m just making myself look like a fool
* My favourite sentence of your story is I hope that I will wake up in a couple of seconds but nothing happends.
* One thing I think you could work on next time is make little setence
Thank you guys I will take My feedback and use it in my next post. :)
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